It Is Not Fair

Is isn't fair. We have all said it. Kids say it all the time. Usually, we say it when we feel that others obtain or are given a particular advantage that we do not have. So we say, "he has got it (advantage), why I have not? It is not fair."

We hardly ever ask it the other way round, as in "why I have got it (advantage), and he has not? It is not fair."

Of course, it is equally 'not fair', when it comes to having a disadvantage. Then the context of query changes too. Now for the complainant, it becomes "why I have got it (disadvantage) and he has not? It is not fair". This is seen as in "why do I get cancer, while others don't, it is not fair". You know it is not true. Everyone is really 'entitled' to have cancer. No one is especially spared.

The world is never fair, get used to it. Some wise men have made this observation long ago. Yes, get used to it. The message in this advice is that continuous feeling about being treated unfairly is really damaging to yourself and it will not improve your situation one bit. In fact, in all probability, sulking in the feeling of unfairness is likely to make you more miserable, and therefore even more 'unfair'.

It is however important to note that, one should not perpetrate unfairness. In other words, we should still try to be fair to others, wherever and whenever possible, despite the world being an overall unfair place. Thus those who have an 'unfair' advantage in possessions should be sharing theirs with the disadvantaged.

At other times, absolute fairness is required, indeed demanded. For example, when we compete according to the rules. Be it sports, academic, art, cultural or whatever competitions. Fairness is absolutely necessary. Similarly the government, rule and order of a community must also be carried out in absolute fairness. In these situations, if fairness is not maintained, the society will break down.

An ancient Chinese saying goes like this:

"In front of me I see people riding on their horses, while I am riding on my cow. When I turn to look back behind me, I see more people walking on foot."

人家骑马我骑牛，回头望望行路汉。

Life is fair, more than fair.